Beloved readers,
This blog is very personal as I pause to remember and celebrate my mother and all the women in my life whose unconditional love has fertilized my heart, mind and soul to press to become the woman God created me to be.
I remember her throughout the year but with Mother’s Day just around the corner; I find myself missing her like it was only yesterday that she took her last breathe. She was truly A Woman of Excellence, and I am so glad to have been a part of her ministry.
I celebrate with you whose mom is still in the land of the living. I send a virtual hug to those of you like me, whose mother is no longer with you and a special prayer for those whose relationship with your mom or your daughter is currently not in a good place.
Some years ago, I had the privilege of writing a memoir about my mom. A Woman of Excellence: The Ministry of My Mother. This easy read shares the dynamics of a mother and daughter relationship and how they can range from healthy to unwholesome.
How we interact or fail to may affect us on so many levels: emotionally, mentally, physically, financially and spiritually. The Ministry of My Mother reminds me to remember, it’s not how you start, but how you finish. To realize you will experience a storm or two in your lifetime and to reexamine your relationship with your mother, your daughter, but most of all with yourself.
Now don’t go anywhere, scroll down and be encouraged by some daughters and mothers stories that I received a few years ago.
Sharon & Brittany
Words cannot express what my daughter Brittany means to me in 2-3 sentences, so I feel compelled to share the story of Brittany my Angel. After confirmation of my pregnancy, I was told by the doctors that she would bring great joy to me and my family by . At that time, I was in denial being pregnant at the age of 40 and fought with God that this couldn’t be (arms too short to box with God!) One night I had a dream that I had a doctor’s appointment and as my husband and I were getting ready to leave for the appointment the doorbell rang, and it was the doctor. He had a big smile on his face and told me what a blessing she was going to be. I was clothed in a red dress (I don’t wear red) and I interpreted that to mean me and my baby were covered in the blood of Jesus!
When I gave birth to Brittany, we were told there was a suspicion of down syndrome which was confirmed. We loved her even more. Though she has challenges, she has so much drive and ambition. Brittany has brought more love and affection that I could ever imagine! She is very spiritual and truly anointed by God. The evidence and confirmations are overwhelming. God truly uses her to keep me on track when I have doubts and worries (though I try to hide them). She is my guardian angel, my inspiration, my reason for being.
Brittany: I love my mom very much. She helps me with everything and helps me to talk because I stutter. We laugh, dance and pray together. My mommy takes me to all my activities and helps me with my school work. I love church and my mommy takes me. When I had spinal surgery, my mommy bought me a puppy to help with my recovery and that made me very happy. She is the best mommy!
Tonia and Sis Greene
About 30 years ago, our Pastor gave my mother and I a prophetic word from the Lord. He shared that we would have a “model relationship” one that others would look upon and desire. If I went by what was going on at that time it would certainly seem as though he had missed God.
At the age of 17, I left home and to try my hand at adulting. Over the next few years there was little to no communication between my mom and me. However, this did not stop my mother from holding onto what God had spoken regarding us. You see she is a mighty woman of God, one who believes in the power of prayer. She was relentless in prayer for me as she held onto the word of God.
At 23 years old, God begin to restore our relationship. We traveled to West Africa with our church and could have been a coincidence that we ended up as roommates. Upon our return from Africa, my mom purchased a condo and out of nowhere, we found ourselves living under the same roof. It was during this time that God did an extreme makeover in our relationship.
Today, I am 48 years young, and I don’t know what I’d do without my mother. She is one of my best friends and I love her dearly. We don’t always agree, but what mother and daughter do. But in spite of our strong personalities, it is by the power of God and through prayer that we are stronger than we’ve ever been.
We enjoy road trips, shopping and cooking together, although I haven’t mastered her biscuits yet fun trying. Now I’m a mother, my daughter (Serenity) and I totally understand a mother’s love and desires for the best for her child. We are 3 generations of girls who love the Lord and know the power of prayer. Truly God’s promises are ‘Yes and Amen’.
Aleka & Robin
A mother and daughter’s bond is supposed to be unbreakable, but when mental illness plays a part, the relationship becomes difficult.
I was around 5 years old when I began noticing something different about her. The illness had immobilized her comprehension that I was her child, and she was my mother
When kids are supposed to be outside playing and doing kid things, at an early age; having a mother with mental illness, I was learning that people are different. In spite of this, no matter where she went, I wanted to follow. No matter what she did or said, it couldn’t shake or change my love for her…she was my mother. I’m not even sure how, but I was even able to love her pass those times of verbal abuse.
When our relationship turned for the worse, even though my mother resided in the same home, my grandmother took on the responsibility of raising me. Although my grandmother did a wonderful job, nevertheless, I made a vow to always to respect and take care of my mother.
Still today, when I look at her, I don’t see the woman who was not being able to do her part, I see her as a human being, a woman who is doing the best that she can.
Two Mothers Remembered by Joann Snow Duncanson
I had two Mothers – two Mothers I claim
Two different people, yet with the same name.
Two separate women, diverse by design,
But I loved them both because they were mine.
The first was the Mother who carried me here,
Gave birth and nurtured and launched my career.
She was the one whose features I bear,
Complete with the facial expressions I wear.
She gave me her love, which follows me yet,
Along with the examples in life that she set.
As I got older, she somehow younger grew,
And we’d laugh as just Mothers and daughters should do.
But then came the time that her mind clouded so,
And I sensed that the Mother I knew would soon go.
So quickly she changed and turned into the other,
A stranger who dressed in the clothes of my Mother.
Oh, she looked the same, at least at arm’s length,
But now she was the child and I was her strength.
We’d come full circle, we women three,
My Mother the first, the second and me.
And if my own children should come to a day,
When a new Mother comes and the old goes away,
I’d ask of them nothing that I didn’t do.
Love both of your Mothers as both have loved you.
Angela and Sylvia
Aging has given me a clearer understanding of the ups and downs of being a mom.
The strength I have as a woman, mother, friend and Christian, is rooted and fueled from the Sylvia Dowdy (my mom). I know that I could never have walked in her shoes.
As I reflect at the challenges that she has experienced in her life, I am amazed how she made it through and overcame with such dignity.
Even though I am 50+ years old, I still get them. The calls and voice message or text.
“Where are you, it’s dark.” I chuckle because I’m reminded that she loves me just as much and as an adult as she did when I was a child. Her protection of me never ceases.
I still enjoy our talks, our laughs and even our tears. Thank you, God, for my lil lady, meddling as she may be I wouldn’t change this journey or the many more to come!
Pausing With God 